Seriously man, chill. Don't stress so much about one person and relax. Read the Soulmate topic if you want more information on being with a person or not, I posted a few times there. But seriously, relax.
In response to all of your questions:
1) Yes, we have free will, we are allowed to love anyone we want to.
2) Then you would see each other in astral. Many people meet in astral after their physical lives are over. Even more still, often people will make a deal in Astral to be together or find each other in Astral before they begin physical lives.
3) You cannot transcend someone into a god or goddess. Very few can. Even those with the power to trasncend a person into a god or goddess will not do it just because "another god loves them". That person must do something to deserve it. There not not definite criteria for it, but basically trying to be a better person, trying to help others, even at the expense of yourself - basically trying to do "good" without thinking of reward for yourself, and trying to help as many as possible...those are the things that are noticed when we die. Saying "I was loyal to my lover and helped him" is not a valid reason, it means you are a good person, but that is also what one SHOULD do, it is not something to be rewarded for, it is simply what should be done.
4) See above - No, you cannot.
5) ...
6) You are free to go between the Kingdom of Gods and Heaven as often as you want, and stay as long as you want in either location.
7) This is irrelevant as there would be no reason to leave your status, it would not change anything in this relationship you are talking about.
8) You were always able to, and will always be able to. You simply need to learn the skills necessary.
9) ...
See my other posts - but I would *HIGHLY* recommend to you to seriously relax a little, and don't become so attached to this person who you are not even in a relationship with. Even if you were in a relationship with them, do not become so attached you could not give them up. I also know that this makes me seem loveless or heartless. So let me clarify. I will never say to not love a person, not to not do anything for a person, nor to ever not make a person the most important to you and to stand by them always and always help them. But also know that if you become so attached to something that you cannot let it (or them) go, your view of the world will become distorted. This warped perception does not lead to good things, I will not list all of the ways, but it should suffice to say that no matter how important something is, it should only ever be a part of your life, not your life itself.
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..ow well XD