what I did:
practised visualisation for many years .....
in the evening:
in the beginning every time its hard to really "see/hear/feel" object ...., so I visualise a totally white "matrix" ..... exactly like in the movie matrix 1 where neo and morpheus stand in the totally white matrix - learning kung fu ....
then I let a cube grow out of a whit "matrix floor" .... or a sphere or 3D triangle, pyramid e.g. ....
give the cube, shape, colour, visualise it as wood, metall or plastic ....., with shadow .... then I touch it, visualise also the noise when I knock on plastic or wood ....
if all this works I visualise a floor, for example wooden planks of a certain collour ...
a table ..... a glas on the table .... my own hands .... taking the glass, feeling the glass .... putting the glass on the table and hearing the noise .....
then being with my whole body in visualisation, feeling the wooden floor with my feet, touch walls and objects, hearing, feeling, smelling, seeing ....
at this point the visualisation tends to get "independent" ..... like hypagognic pics , like entering a DVD ......... I enter the visualisation, for example going to bed and entering my own visualised matrix ....
like the inner temple exercise of golden dawn .... or body of light exercise ....
what happens after these exercise, also physical plane tends to change!!!!!
for example I visualised a beach with beautiful girl .... was totallly into this visualisation ....
I was feeling the sand between my toes, sun on my skin, hearing the waves of the ocean, every detail of the - I am honest - very beautfiful naked woman .... hehe .... u may already know - she didnt say no and I visualised every dirty detail of having perfect sex with her ...;-) it was so real that i got scared because I was feeling I was about to produce a very sexy elemental!!!!! it began to be like a seperate and fully conscious being in astral!!!
strange feeling directly after the exercise like in the movie matrix when the agents changed something ..... next day a wonderfull girl in yogacenter talked to me, drove me home, we really liked each other...... next days suddenly dozens of girls had a totally different behaviour, even my female yoga students wanted to have breakfast with me ....it was like over night I changed ito the object of desire of almost every woman???!!! Suddenly I got compliments I never heared in my whole life ....
astral: for example I got lucid in astral, i was skiing down a hill. .... there was a station going downwards ...... I entered the ski lift ....it went down cliffy - it was like an initiation, somebody asked me for a few creditcard like tools ...I didnt have the right one ..... somebody said there is a cheater who doesnt have the right one ..... but they let me through ....
at this point I was in between lucid and dreaming ....
it continued and the I went further down like passing different astral spheres on my way to earth ...... was totally realistic and lasted for subjective 1-2 hours!!!!
I am totally convinced that this "ski lift" in astral exists as some kind of "brige" beteen the gates ... and by subconsciousness made some kind of ski lift out of it ...
happens very often that while I wake up my memory of an astral experience changes into some kine of memory of a lucid dream .... sometimes I realise it and get back to the real memory, sometimes I feel there is another kind of memory but i dont get it any more, just the dream memory ....
it seems I produced spomething like an astral doorway, with the side effect of changing my physical reality like I could change m movie while watching it .... like a MMORG online game ...
just scary because it also works with money, weather, women, house, holiday, everything in physical world!! U play god, U play being the producer of your own movie ...... but also unpleasant side effects sometimes ....I slowly begin to understand how magick works hehe ....
it doesnt matter if you visualise a pencil, a book or a very beautiful woman ..... in astral it becomes an elemental, sometimes it dissapears soon, but if you visualise every single detail AND give your FULL emotional power into the visualisation it becomes like an astral entity!
when I was a child sometimes I visualised a big big black puma with green evil eyes wich protected me .....
when other pupils gave me a hard time they saw it in their dreams, it bite them and chased them, one of them ran out of the room thinking a big dog is in the room, he felt the breath of a big dark animal ....
just that today I begin to fully understand how it works.....
also its hard for me to be a "gooooooooood" person in the way I always "help" .... seems as if I would be some kind of grey wizzard .... even my last 3 girlfriends sometimes where scared in their dremas because I looked totally different like a very big in between of angel, , siva, demon and wizzard ....
one said I told her in her dream: the one who can turn into snake god sees his face in the shadow .....I was teaching her how to kill demons in her dreams ... and truned into some kind of siva / snakegod or whatever ....
this year I had, while being in an indian ashram - the AP that I was totally allmighty - had wings and killed demons with blue light coming out of my mouth (OM chant) and hands ....
